What they say what they mean

Dictionary


WOMEN’S ENGLISH:

1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = you’ll be sorry
6. We need to talk = You’re in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = You better not
8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
10. You’re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

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MEN’S ENGLISH:

1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = Let’s have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I’d like to have sex with you
8. Can I call you sometime? = I’d like to have sex with you
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I’d like to have sex with you
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I’d like to have sex with you

Women in Uniform

Women are in step, if not ahead, of men in most areas. Finally the last male bastion of fighting forces has been invaded by women. Do men mind, hmmm I think not. So here is a quick look at women from all over the world in the uniform...Some are more dangerous than others...


The Russian Army




















The US Army















The Indian Army

















The Brazilian Army

















The Chinese Army













The Korean Army















The Israeli Army














And Last but not the least.....

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The Pakistani Army

Boys will be BOYZZZ

Ever Wondered why your folks were so hard on you or why your grandparents chose to move to a retirement home away from you!! Well the following is just a glimpse into some of the reasons
why boys will be boys :

One Liners

Q: What did the lonely banana say?
A: I'm a"kela".

Q: What did the green peas say?
A: Nothing. They just "mutter"ed.

Q: What did the potato say when it answered the phone ?
A: "Aaloo?"

Q: Where do cauliflowers hang out?
A: In the Gobi desert.

Q: What did the flower say to its girl-friend?
A: Why do phools fall in love?

Q: What did the fat car say?
A: I'm a mota car.

Q: What did the confused egg say?
A: I don't unda-stand.

Q: Where do earrings go on holiday?
A: Bali

Q: What do shrimps sing on Christmas?
A: Jhinga Bells.

Q: What did the half eaten naan say?
A: I wish I was puri.

Q: What did the lonely potato sing?
A: "Aaloo lonesome tonight?"

Q: What language do carrots speak?
A: Gajar-ati.

Q: What do you call a bald poet?
A: Ik-bal.

Q: What did the first pizza slice say to the other pizza slice so it
would move?
A: Pizza - "HUT"